The 25th Short Story
Dances Full of Laughs
"Dances Full of Laughs"
ANDY'S LESSONS FROM LIFE
My 25th Short Story
This story is unique in that it includes a quote from Bonnie to start it off. If you were wondering, my sweetheart reviews and blesses most of my short stories, as she did with this one and all the chapters of all my books!!! In many ways, we are one! In other ways, we couldn't be more different -- that's a good thing!!!
I hope you enjoy more of Andy's life experiences and the lessons that come with them.
"Dances Full of Laughs"
“Hope springs eternal but can be crushed in a millisecond.”
--Bonnie Skrzynski
If there was one thing I learned from mistakes with my first two wives, marriages involved a lot of give-and-take to maintain healthy and friendly relationships. Needless to say, I was all about remaining somewhat open to trying new things my lovely partner enjoyed -- but dancing? You’ve got to be kidding.
You see, I was born stiff as a board with two left feet and absolutely no rhythm whatsoever. Worse yet, I hated performing frivolous feats, especially if they made me look stupid in public.
Prancing around like a fool in front of my friends was not my cup of tea. My buddies didn’t need any more ammo to poke fun at me. They had plenty of that from all of my other acts of craziness.
A couple of years into our marriage, Bonnie and I were settling into our patterns and adapting to each other quite well -- if I do say so myself. Getting accustomed to all the different activities our young daughters desired and adjusting to managing ever-changing schedules was an added benefit.
One evening, when the girls were working on their homework, my sweetheart settled into the couch and snuggled up to me. “Hey, now that we’ve got a little extra time on our hands, why don’t we have a date night each week?”
Hmmm, this could be good or bad. Biting my lip, I turned toward her. “What do you have in mind, dear?”
“I was thinking...,” she trailed off a moment, then gleefully blurted, “...we should take some dancing lessons together.”
Ugh. What’s wrong with slow dancing in a circle and changing directions once in a while? What more does anybody need than that? We hold each other close and can still mix in a kiss or two, with a little conversation to boot. Even though I was perfectly happy with such an arrangement, Bonnie wasn’t -- obviously.
She quickly tossed out a few more perceived perks and toward the end of her fervent pitch, I smirked. “So, what’s this bundle of joy going to cost?”
“Well, it’s a lot less than I was expecting. The first four lessons are free, so if we don't like it, we haven’t lost a thing.”
“And what does it cost us after that?”
“Don’t worry about that for now. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
I rolled my eyes in my mind so she couldn’t actually see me doing it. If my dear wife had to start a justification in such a fashion, I was certain it was going to cost us a lot more than I wanted to pay.
In the end, it really didn’t matter the cost, I would be battered to submission with all the wonderful benefits our marriage would gain from such a wonderful experience. Since many of our friends would still consider us newlyweds, I certainly didn’t want to rock the boat so soon.
My hesitation rested with a very simple fact. I was the klutziest man to ever roam the dance halls of Earth. Since I hadn’t figured it out up to that point in my life, why should I ever expect to get any better?
The more I thought about it, the greater the panic. How is a human supposed to listen to the music, stick to the beat, gently guide my partner’s hip in one direction, while using the other hand to pull her along and keep my feet from crossing each other or stepping on my partners toes? This is way too hard! I’m never going to be Fred Astaire!
I sucked a deep breath and closed my eyes. I’m doomed. I'll be paying out my ears for this disaster!
Following the introductions and a few quick pointers about posture and position, during our first lesson, we were asked to try a rather easy maneuver on the dance floor. After playing many sports up to that point in my life, I figured learning a simple dance routine shouldn't be too taxing.
Our instructor demonstrated the basic waltz with only 4 to 5 steps, which seemed pretty mundane. As the teacher and his female partner stepped through the motions a couple of times with ease, my confidence rose ever so slightly.
When it was our turn and the music began, we totally blew our entrance right off the bat. My sweet wife must not have heard the instructor explain that the man should lead his partner through the routine, but Bonnie is a strong-willed woman and wasn’t about to let me be the one guiding us through our steps.
Rather than a graceful pair displaying our newly learned skills, we were butting heads, while engaged in an all-out form of tug-of-war. I tried my best to lead, but after a battle of wills, I quickly gave into my lovely bride’s insistent nature. This is HER thing. I might as well let her do what she wants!
Bearing an inordinate amount of initial frustration, we both finally agreed to just go through the motions without anybody leading the other. That was the best compromise we were ever going to hope for at that stage in our meager development as dance partners.
Luckily, my first couple of missteps of stubbing Bonnie’s toes turned into a bit of comic relief. We’d have a hearty laugh and move on. Such fleeting moments appeared to break the tension for all of a minute at most.
We finally got to the point where we could consistently progress through the steps in a timely manner, but not without me stepping on my partner’s feet more often than not. Every third step or so, she’d screech, “Ouch! That hurts!”
Her growing pains were no laughing matter, but some of our predicament was of her own doing. She’s the one that wanted to do this so badly!
Embarrassed with each of her outbursts of pain, I’d glance around at all the stares and shrug with a grin. I was doing the best I could with this exercise of total futility for a clumsy fella like me. I can’t help it if I was born with two left feet and not a hint of rhythm! I’d much rather play basketball! I froze for a moment, then quickly glanced at her to make sure I hadn’t mistakenly blurted that out loud.
Our next week’s session didn’t go much better. In fact, I seemed to repeat all the same floundering miscues with the ease of a blooming idiot.
We’d attempt a few new dance routines, I’d step on Bonnie’s toes several times, she’d screech and shoot me a quick glare, and I’d apologize profusely. After all that abuse over the evening’s event, I’d help my partner limp to the car and head home with barely a word between us.
Even though my wife promised we’d have fun doing this, the first two lessons felt more like torture than any kind of entertainment. The trip home from another embarrassing evening left me shaking my head. We’re going to end up spending all this money, and I’m not learning squat! How did I ever let her talk me into this?
I really didn’t want to cause myself any further humiliation, but I knew all too well. If I quit now, I’ll have to make it up to Bonnie for the rest of my life! So off we went to our third session.
My dear wife must have sensed my reluctance. “I know this probably isn’t easy, but I do see an improvement in you from those first couple of lessons. It will get easier. You’ll see.”
I grinned while scouting for a parking spot. She’s certainly right about it not being easy. I’d rather work for one of the super duper pooper scooper outfits and pump out people’s septic tanks than to try to learn how to dance any more. She’s just trying to sweet talk me into continuing.
Sighing, I turned off the car and smiled at her. “Let’s get this thing over with.”
“Oh, come on. Promise me we’ll have fun.”
Fun? She can’t possibly be serious! I closed my eyes for a moment, then forced a smile. “I promise.” Not really, but what choice do I have?
Like a forlorn puppy unable to learn to go to the door when Mother Nature called, I tucked my tail between my legs and relented to do as expected. With a lot of smiles and gentle coaxing from my sweet partner and the instructor, I eventually grew more at ease with the different steps and spins.
In fact, Bonnie and I were beginning to laugh at ourselves for all the goofy mistakes we kept making. The laughter grew much louder and almost uncontrollable as we became more relaxed. At times, we were laughing so hard I’m sure everybody in the place must have thought we’d been drinking before we arrived.
To my utter surprise, I did find it a little easier to go through the paces, just like Bonnie said. It helped that we were learning the Polka that evening. I had always enjoyed watching other people kicking it up while gliding across the dance floor to accordion music at Polish weddings.
I chuckled at the memory of some of my aunts and uncles whirling around during such events. I drew a deep breath. I’m going to try my best with this one. Sure enough, the more we continued across the dance floor, the greater I enjoyed the experience.
While going through the moves, I looked at my lovely wife. Her smile grew wider and her face happier than I could remember in quite some time.
I hated to admit it. Maybe, she was right! I can’t believe I’m having so much fun!
After agreeing to shell out the money for additional lessons, the next few sessions continued being as fun as the last. Before I knew it, I was looking forward to going out and having a blast -- kicking up our heels and laughing to our hearts’ content. By the time we reached the final evening, I wouldn't have minded continuing with such a fun exercise, if we didn’t have to pay more.
Toward the end of our last lesson, a big smile spread across Bonnie’s face. I knew from her expression, something profound was about to escape her lips. “You’ve really improved so much." Her smile grew even wider. "I can’t wait to try some of these dances when we go out on weekends.”
Astonished, I vigorously shook my head. “What are you talking about? I’m never doing this in public!”
**********
That's it for now. After doling out $1,200 and all those months of lessons, we still slow dance to this very day.
Thank you for all of your amazing support!
Andy Skrzynski
ANDY'S LESSONS FROM LIFE
My 25th Short Story
This story is unique in that it includes a quote from Bonnie to start it off. If you were wondering, my sweetheart reviews and blesses most of my short stories, as she did with this one and all the chapters of all my books!!! In many ways, we are one! In other ways, we couldn't be more different -- that's a good thing!!!
I hope you enjoy more of Andy's life experiences and the lessons that come with them.
"Dances Full of Laughs"
“Hope springs eternal but can be crushed in a millisecond.”
--Bonnie Skrzynski
If there was one thing I learned from mistakes with my first two wives, marriages involved a lot of give-and-take to maintain healthy and friendly relationships. Needless to say, I was all about remaining somewhat open to trying new things my lovely partner enjoyed -- but dancing? You’ve got to be kidding.
You see, I was born stiff as a board with two left feet and absolutely no rhythm whatsoever. Worse yet, I hated performing frivolous feats, especially if they made me look stupid in public.
Prancing around like a fool in front of my friends was not my cup of tea. My buddies didn’t need any more ammo to poke fun at me. They had plenty of that from all of my other acts of craziness.
A couple of years into our marriage, Bonnie and I were settling into our patterns and adapting to each other quite well -- if I do say so myself. Getting accustomed to all the different activities our young daughters desired and adjusting to managing ever-changing schedules was an added benefit.
One evening, when the girls were working on their homework, my sweetheart settled into the couch and snuggled up to me. “Hey, now that we’ve got a little extra time on our hands, why don’t we have a date night each week?”
Hmmm, this could be good or bad. Biting my lip, I turned toward her. “What do you have in mind, dear?”
“I was thinking...,” she trailed off a moment, then gleefully blurted, “...we should take some dancing lessons together.”
Ugh. What’s wrong with slow dancing in a circle and changing directions once in a while? What more does anybody need than that? We hold each other close and can still mix in a kiss or two, with a little conversation to boot. Even though I was perfectly happy with such an arrangement, Bonnie wasn’t -- obviously.
She quickly tossed out a few more perceived perks and toward the end of her fervent pitch, I smirked. “So, what’s this bundle of joy going to cost?”
“Well, it’s a lot less than I was expecting. The first four lessons are free, so if we don't like it, we haven’t lost a thing.”
“And what does it cost us after that?”
“Don’t worry about that for now. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
I rolled my eyes in my mind so she couldn’t actually see me doing it. If my dear wife had to start a justification in such a fashion, I was certain it was going to cost us a lot more than I wanted to pay.
In the end, it really didn’t matter the cost, I would be battered to submission with all the wonderful benefits our marriage would gain from such a wonderful experience. Since many of our friends would still consider us newlyweds, I certainly didn’t want to rock the boat so soon.
My hesitation rested with a very simple fact. I was the klutziest man to ever roam the dance halls of Earth. Since I hadn’t figured it out up to that point in my life, why should I ever expect to get any better?
The more I thought about it, the greater the panic. How is a human supposed to listen to the music, stick to the beat, gently guide my partner’s hip in one direction, while using the other hand to pull her along and keep my feet from crossing each other or stepping on my partners toes? This is way too hard! I’m never going to be Fred Astaire!
I sucked a deep breath and closed my eyes. I’m doomed. I'll be paying out my ears for this disaster!
Following the introductions and a few quick pointers about posture and position, during our first lesson, we were asked to try a rather easy maneuver on the dance floor. After playing many sports up to that point in my life, I figured learning a simple dance routine shouldn't be too taxing.
Our instructor demonstrated the basic waltz with only 4 to 5 steps, which seemed pretty mundane. As the teacher and his female partner stepped through the motions a couple of times with ease, my confidence rose ever so slightly.
When it was our turn and the music began, we totally blew our entrance right off the bat. My sweet wife must not have heard the instructor explain that the man should lead his partner through the routine, but Bonnie is a strong-willed woman and wasn’t about to let me be the one guiding us through our steps.
Rather than a graceful pair displaying our newly learned skills, we were butting heads, while engaged in an all-out form of tug-of-war. I tried my best to lead, but after a battle of wills, I quickly gave into my lovely bride’s insistent nature. This is HER thing. I might as well let her do what she wants!
Bearing an inordinate amount of initial frustration, we both finally agreed to just go through the motions without anybody leading the other. That was the best compromise we were ever going to hope for at that stage in our meager development as dance partners.
Luckily, my first couple of missteps of stubbing Bonnie’s toes turned into a bit of comic relief. We’d have a hearty laugh and move on. Such fleeting moments appeared to break the tension for all of a minute at most.
We finally got to the point where we could consistently progress through the steps in a timely manner, but not without me stepping on my partner’s feet more often than not. Every third step or so, she’d screech, “Ouch! That hurts!”
Her growing pains were no laughing matter, but some of our predicament was of her own doing. She’s the one that wanted to do this so badly!
Embarrassed with each of her outbursts of pain, I’d glance around at all the stares and shrug with a grin. I was doing the best I could with this exercise of total futility for a clumsy fella like me. I can’t help it if I was born with two left feet and not a hint of rhythm! I’d much rather play basketball! I froze for a moment, then quickly glanced at her to make sure I hadn’t mistakenly blurted that out loud.
Our next week’s session didn’t go much better. In fact, I seemed to repeat all the same floundering miscues with the ease of a blooming idiot.
We’d attempt a few new dance routines, I’d step on Bonnie’s toes several times, she’d screech and shoot me a quick glare, and I’d apologize profusely. After all that abuse over the evening’s event, I’d help my partner limp to the car and head home with barely a word between us.
Even though my wife promised we’d have fun doing this, the first two lessons felt more like torture than any kind of entertainment. The trip home from another embarrassing evening left me shaking my head. We’re going to end up spending all this money, and I’m not learning squat! How did I ever let her talk me into this?
I really didn’t want to cause myself any further humiliation, but I knew all too well. If I quit now, I’ll have to make it up to Bonnie for the rest of my life! So off we went to our third session.
My dear wife must have sensed my reluctance. “I know this probably isn’t easy, but I do see an improvement in you from those first couple of lessons. It will get easier. You’ll see.”
I grinned while scouting for a parking spot. She’s certainly right about it not being easy. I’d rather work for one of the super duper pooper scooper outfits and pump out people’s septic tanks than to try to learn how to dance any more. She’s just trying to sweet talk me into continuing.
Sighing, I turned off the car and smiled at her. “Let’s get this thing over with.”
“Oh, come on. Promise me we’ll have fun.”
Fun? She can’t possibly be serious! I closed my eyes for a moment, then forced a smile. “I promise.” Not really, but what choice do I have?
Like a forlorn puppy unable to learn to go to the door when Mother Nature called, I tucked my tail between my legs and relented to do as expected. With a lot of smiles and gentle coaxing from my sweet partner and the instructor, I eventually grew more at ease with the different steps and spins.
In fact, Bonnie and I were beginning to laugh at ourselves for all the goofy mistakes we kept making. The laughter grew much louder and almost uncontrollable as we became more relaxed. At times, we were laughing so hard I’m sure everybody in the place must have thought we’d been drinking before we arrived.
To my utter surprise, I did find it a little easier to go through the paces, just like Bonnie said. It helped that we were learning the Polka that evening. I had always enjoyed watching other people kicking it up while gliding across the dance floor to accordion music at Polish weddings.
I chuckled at the memory of some of my aunts and uncles whirling around during such events. I drew a deep breath. I’m going to try my best with this one. Sure enough, the more we continued across the dance floor, the greater I enjoyed the experience.
While going through the moves, I looked at my lovely wife. Her smile grew wider and her face happier than I could remember in quite some time.
I hated to admit it. Maybe, she was right! I can’t believe I’m having so much fun!
After agreeing to shell out the money for additional lessons, the next few sessions continued being as fun as the last. Before I knew it, I was looking forward to going out and having a blast -- kicking up our heels and laughing to our hearts’ content. By the time we reached the final evening, I wouldn't have minded continuing with such a fun exercise, if we didn’t have to pay more.
Toward the end of our last lesson, a big smile spread across Bonnie’s face. I knew from her expression, something profound was about to escape her lips. “You’ve really improved so much." Her smile grew even wider. "I can’t wait to try some of these dances when we go out on weekends.”
Astonished, I vigorously shook my head. “What are you talking about? I’m never doing this in public!”
**********
That's it for now. After doling out $1,200 and all those months of lessons, we still slow dance to this very day.
Thank you for all of your amazing support!
Andy Skrzynski