Frustration
I figured it must have been part of God's nature to toss a few tormenting obstacles in my path to occasionally test my anger responses. I wouldn't dare think he might be doing it purposely for kicks, but there were moments of weakness when I had a tough time holding back such suspicions.
Vulnerable
I thought parents were supposed to do their best to protect children from things that scared them, not usher them into the jaws of terror.
Manipulative
I didn't want anybody thinking I was too excited, or they might get the idea I owed them something. It was to my advantage to make it look like I was doing them a big favor.
One of Many Prayers
Lord, can you help me out? I'm not having much fun these days. Can't you just make me a grown-up now so I can skip all this hard kid stuff?
Relief
Even though Tata wouldn't answer all my questions, being together with Little Brother and Baby Sister sure beat being stuck in the orphanage, any day, any time, and twice on Sundays. I had absolutely no idea what "twice on Sundays" meant, but grown-ups seemed to like it a lot, and it was starting to grow on me.
Turmoil Within
Learning how to deal with a new nun and determining who was good and bad out of this other bunch of boys wasn't something I particularly relished. Nothing was ever easy in this crazy prison of mine. Just when you think you've got it figured out -- boom. Let's change it up on good ole Andy. Can't make things too comfortable for him! My stomach churned so much I wanted to puke.
Lesson Learned
Maybe so, but if we aren't supposed to use words like crap in the orphanage, why did she just say it? I wanted to ask but thought the timing to be less than ideal. Lowering my eyes, I shook my head. Better never use any words I hear from Jimmy again. Guess he's never lived in an orphanage.